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Marry your friends, preach tomorrow

Never before has wedded bliss been so quickly attainable.

No longer is the seven-hour drive to Vegas to tie the knot necessary.

Instead, all that is needed is access to the Internet.

All one has to do is log onto www.ulc.org, the home page of the Universal Life Church, which was founded in Modesto, Calif. Here, one can receive a free on-line ordination by submitting just the basics: name, address and e-mail.

There are currently over 18.3 million ordained ministers in the Universal Life Church.

With the ULC's Certificate of Ordination that is automatically created on the Web site, one can do just about anything a minister can do.

It's the fast food version of an ordination certificate brought to you by the Universal Life Church.

And if that's just not enough, additional materials are available for order to make anyone's new job as a minister a piece of cake.

The $10 ULC textbook is essential to learn about marriage laws and ceremonies. For only $25 per month, the church can offer marriage licenses.

Better yet, if one feels the urge to possess one of those "little black books" seen in the hands of ministers on soap operas, it's as simple as making out a $79 check for the "Ministry in a Box," which also includes a supply of Holy Land incense.

It's that easy. Friends no longer have to walk down the aisle in a bubble gum pink dress or too-tight-tux to be a part of a marriage ceremony.

As an ordained minister of the Universal Life Church, anyone can legally conduct the marriage ceremony, forgive a couple of their sins and provide pastoral counseling if things go wrong.