To be or not to be... on campus


By Nate Buchik
Arizona Daily Wildcat
Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Getting out of your parents' house is a great blessing. Hell, I could've gone and shacked up at the No-Tell-Motel and it would have been a step in the right direction. (But most college freshmen won't have to deal with blacklights when they get out.)

Now that the leash is off, you have two options at the UA: take your chances in the dorms or live off campus.

The differences are countless, but I'll try to count some for you anyway.

Roommates:

Dealing with roommates is always difficult. Whether it's the close friend that you grow to hate or the fresh freak that you think might be wearing your underwear, you'll have roommate problems.

In the dorms, these problems aren't as bad. While there's a good chance you'll have a "totally insane roommate," they'll be plenty of others in the dorm who have similar complaints. A crazy roommate is a plus, because you'll have great stories to tell, like the time he got drunk and woke up in a pool of his own urine/vomit.

If you live off-campus, you're stuck. This could be great, if you've decided to room with your BFF (omg!), but don't sign a lease with a random roommate if you aren't in the dorms. Off-campus, you're stuck with your roommate morning, noon and night. They'll eat your snack cakes and you'll end up having to mark all your stuff with post-it notes.

Neighbors:

Dorm life can be great for the socialite or fever-inducing for the hermit. There will always be people partying, playing video games and watching mind-numbing television somewhere in your dorm. And everyone is invited. No matter how big of a loser you were in high school, you'll be invited to party in the dorms in college. Everyone is so excited to be away from home that no one has time to judge you beyond how fast you can chug a Natty Ice. And if your dorm is co-ed, you'll meet boatloads of potential hookups.

Neighbors are all but nonexistent off-campus. You might let them know if you're having a party (so they don't call the cops, not to invite them), but you'll have to find new friends in your Nutrition, Food and You section.

Authority:

Can you handle the RA? Can you handle the homeowners association?

If you move out of the house, away from the nagging of your parents, do you really want anyone to tell you what to do again? No. But your resident assistant won't tell you what to do, he or she will mostly just bust you if you smoke weed in the dorms. You might never see them (like I did) or you might get them to do keg stands with you in the basement (like my friend did). But don't worry, they aren't your parents, they're college students. They can't make you mow the lawn.

The homeowners association will let you drink, but they won't let you put that plastic flamingo in your front yard. Same goes for your landlord. Unfortunately, you won't have complete freedom until you're dead. But if you use tape instead of nails to hang pictures, and you'll avoid most hassles.

Conclusion:

If you're a lonely kid who wants to break out of your shell, stay in the dorms.

If you've got a friend coming down with you who you've known for a long time, get an apartment or a house.

If you're in any other situation, stay in the dorms for a year like everyone else. At its very worst, it's a valuable learning experience

Note: If you are going to reside in an honors dorm, none of this column will be true. Everyone will seriously want to study all the time.

Another note: If you're a Tucson native and have to live at home, that sucks.