Caution! Spoiler ahead: This movie sucks.In a bad economy, everyone is struggling to make ends meet. So why do we waste our precious, hard-earned money on prepackaged Hollywood? It's beyond me. And I'm starting to lose faith in humanity.
I can sum up the premise of the movie in four words: White people are crazy.
Usually, that's a boat I can hop aboard, but not in this case. A guy who looks like he took styling and acting lessons from Vanilla Ice plays the main "crazy white boy" character. This white guy and his white guy posse duel against the main characters in a break-dance competition that, in the end, teaches everyone about friendship, love and life. Can someone please hand me a Kleenex?
There are some underlying positive messages in this movie: Friendship is a terrible thing to waste, don't do drugs and beware of ugly wannabe gangsta white boys. I've seen it all before. Wake me up when it's over.
For pure journalism's (and humanity's) sake, I've compiled a top 10 list for those who are considering seeing this movie. It is "The Top 10 Reasons I Hated 'You Got Served'" (in no particular order):
1. Its leading man is from B2K. B2K, you ask? Yes, B2K.
2. Wade Robson makes a cameo. For those of you, like myself, who don't know who Wade Robson is, he's the guy who gets made fun of on Saturday Night Live when Seth Meyers goes, "With a Chickaka kaka kaka. No one? Just me? All right." Seeing this movie made me appreciate that comedy sketch a lot more. God bless you, Seth Meyers. God bless you.
3. Its tagline is, "If you want respect, you've got to take it." Doesn't that make you want to plunge something sharp into your aorta? No one? Just me? All right.
4. Lil' Kim has a cameo.
5. Lil' Kim's boobs have a cameo.
6. Steve Harvey has a cameo. How many movies does this man need to be in before someone tells him to stick to stand-up? Just give up Steve - you can't act.
7. The directing was choppy, sloppy and there was very little variety. I swear I could do better.
8. The dialogue was empty, and the same can be said about the acting. Ye gods, where did they find these people? Oh, that's right: in Tiger Beat.
9. It bothered me that I didn't buy a drink and could not find an escape through bathroom breakage. I'll know next time. Lesson learned.
10. This movie made me want to dance ... right out of the theater. The dancing was tragically sub par and does not make up for the rest of this shit-storm-of-a-movie.
Don't make the same mistake I did. Don't be tricked by the previews. This movie is not entertaining. This movie is not good. This movie will ruin your night. Spend your money on something else: a better movie, dinner, laundry or booze. You'll regret it if you don't. Trust me.