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Freshman digs old-school comedians, hopes Seinfeld won't end up like them
Wildcat: My name is Kylee and you're on the spot. So tell me, what do you think about Johnny Carson dying (of emphysema)?
Gustin: I think it was really sad. Johnny Carson was a big legend, you know. A TV entrepreneur, so I thought it was horrible. Sad.
Wildcat: Were you old enough to stay up that late to watch his show?
Gustin: I saw some of the reruns. We had tapes at home, so I just watched that.
Wildcat: OK, do you think Bill Cosby did it?
Gustin: Did what?
Wildcat: Molested that woman that's accusing him of ... molesting her a year ago. You haven't heard about that?
Gustin: No, I didn't hear about that.
Wildcat: You think Bill Cosby would do something like that?
Gustin: Not at all.
Wildcat: Why not?
Gustin: Because he just seems like such a straightforward guy.
Wildcat: What does that mean?
Gustin: He's just an honest, upstanding guy. You know, he seems pretty passionate about his beliefs.
Wildcat: Do you think this is a foreshadowing for what's to come for other comedians this year?
Gustin: I don't know. They always say things happen in threes, so who knows? Someone might be the third. I have no idea.
Wildcat: You don't have any idea of who it could be?
Gustin: I don't know. I just hope it doesn't happen to Seinfeld.
Freshman sticks it to global warming mongers and her crazy relatives
Wildcat: I'm Kylee and you're on the spot. So, where do you plan to be when the world comes to an end?
Hafenscher: Well let's see. When the world ends, I plan to be on vacation somewhere.
Wildcat: Where?
Hafenscher: On an island somewhere, on a beach.
Wildcat: Do you want to be alone or with somebody?
Hafenscher: I suppose I'd be with my family. Not the crazy ones in the mental hospital.
Wildcat: Why are your relatives in mental hospitals?
Hafenscher: Well, they're all crazy.
Wildcat: Has nothing been significantly diagnosed?
Hafenscher: There's been manic depression, depression, suicidal, that's pretty much all of it.
Wildcat: That sounds just like my family. We have so much in common. So, the reason I ask you all this is because, supposedly, now global warming has reached that peak where it's detrimental and could actually harm us. Do you think global warming is a threat?
Hafenscher: No.
Wildcat: Why not?
Hafenscher: Well, I actually just had a debate about this last semester and I know that water vapor has a lot to do with it, but after all the tests with fossil fuels and stuff, there really doesn't seem to be that much of a problem. I mean, sure we need to cut down on it 'cause the carbon's bad, but other than that, I really don't think there's a problem.
Wildcat: You're the first person I've spoken to who knows that much about global warming. I'm very impressed.
- Interviews conducted by Kylee Dawson