Marketing of Renaissance

Brian D. Rothschild Arizona Daily Wildcat As she dances and gyrates, Nadia attempts to seduce the audience at the annual Renaissance Festival 30 miles east of Phoenix.

These gypsy-type vagabonds have brought the same stuff they sell at street fairs and outside of concerts. Their hemp necklaces, silver jewelry and baggy tye-dyed clothing usually considered as hippie-type have been incorporated into the Renaissance.

"I came all the way from Texas for the waggery and to get drunk," said Xaiver, who was wearing a knight's uniform. "Usually we camp out in the parking lot and party all night but these punks who own this stupid place won't let us. That totally sucks."

It was hard to distinguish who was part of the show or just passing through, and most of the families there probably had no idea that a lot of the people there dressed that way everyday. Deadheads who wore old, weathered clothes and hadn't showered in days could have been mistaken as paid actors.

Sir John Russel, a Knight of Adria, a historical medieval recreation society, is suited in armor most of the year. He said that members of Adria take their combat very seriously. He said the group has a king and an entire court.

Members advance their position by battling other knights in the group. Some people thought that Sir John was part of the jousting exhibition which was performed by professional stuntmen.

The deadheads ( or so-called peasants) that follow the festival exist within a unique sub-culture of Renaissance fanatics, representing the lower portion of a social-class system very similar to the time period that the festival depicts. Some had traveled more than 2,000 miles to be here and claimed they made a living playing chess.

At the top is the royalty, which is played by the corporate entities, which include Fry's Food Stores and Dairy Queen , who own the 25-acre medieval village and profit on every head that strolls into town.

These corporations act as the "king" of the Arizona Renaissance Festival and levy a tax on each person (the $11 admission price) who enters the artisan marketplace. Of course, the smiling King Henry seen mingling with the townspeople is an actor, but make no mistake who is running the show.

In the middle class are about 50 skilled craftsman and village shop merchants. Some of them claim to use processes and techniques used during the 14th and 15th centuries for wood carving, weaving, armor making, and glass blowing. Although many of the authentic crafts of the Renaissance period were present, I never saw any craftsman in action.

There was a blacksmith at a table with a hammer and a few pieces of scrap metal, but all he seemed to use it for was something to lean up against while he hustled his merchandise, which included an 85-pound Gothic suit of armor priced at $2,000.The authenticity of one of the most historic pieces at the festival, a Gutenberg Press, which is credited as starting the Renaissance period, was questionable. Sure it had the moveable lead-alloy typecast and the rest of the original parts. But I never saw them use the press to make the framed and matted pictures for sale. A computer and a decent laser printer could pump out very authentic forgeries quite easily.There were several stained glass makers but the majority of their shops were devoted to pre-manufactured products. Most stores at the festival gladly accepted Master Card, Lady Visa, and Lord Discover.The streets of the village were well designed and filled with distractions - entertainment, food and shopping in practically every location of the village.

While you watched one of the 10 performance venues, several food choices were available. Michaelangelo's Pizza, Feast of Fowl (turkey leg) and Steak-on-a-stake seemed to be favorites at the festival. But the Hot Dragon Wings and the Prince's Pretzels were also popular items.

Bud Light was a crowd pleaser during the unusually warm spring day, and when the keg went dry, groups of men almost instinctively grunted and cheered until their cups were filled.Some of the people who frolicked among the boisterous villagers felt the need to become more involved with the royal shenanigans and amusing antics that surrounded them. These people took advantage of the fanciful costumes for rent, and added to the flavor and ambiance of the Renaissance village.

Most of the men wore costumes that resembled ones from a Monty Python movie. They wore skin-tight leotards that left very little of a man's anatomy to the imagination (If this seems intimidating, the simple placement of a tube sock can cure any insecurity).

Women are encouraged to take the role of a maiden, princess or gypsy. The bottom of their dresses are very similar to ones worn today, but the tops practically push a women's bosom to eye level, most likely being the inspiration behind the push-up bra.

Staying true to the time period, the festival devotes a lot of attention to sexuality. Comic Duelists, Don Juan and Miguel perform a routine where one of the fighters is gay, and most of the punch lines focus on sexual orientation.The Gypsy Magic ethnic dance was very sensual and erotic. Fascinated by the gypsys, I asked what was so appealing about the gypsy culture for the dancers.

"Well, I like working two days a week," said Electra, one of the gypsy dancers.

The festival is only open weekends. So much for some deep spiritual meaning behind the dance. It's just a paycheck.

Throughout the village, lovely maidens have been strategically placed by the "corporate king," all of whom display a gratuitous amount of cleavage.

When a maiden, or a "wench" is approached by a man she says, "Can I help you my lord?" then smiles and looks away, inviting a casual glance at her breasts. Even though using sex isn't exactly a new tactic to sell stuff, but the degree to which these lusty wenches were prostituting themselves was ridiculous. Hopefully the amount they get paid makes it worth it.

Randy Reid of Apace Junction said this was the second year she had worked at the Renaissance Festival.

" I really like the royalty clothing and the exciting atmosphere," Reid said.

Families have not been forgotten at the festival. Smee and Blog, the singing executioners, sing songs only children could enjoy like the "Boogie Man Picnic."

"Here at Venos house of Squid, gonna eat his wife and kids. Hide a squid in your shorts, and you'll be excused from sports," Smee sang.

Elephant rides are also offered for kids. Elephants were the first lavish gifts of peace between Muslims and Christians. King Charlemagne of France was given an elephant by the Moors, (Muslim people of North West Africa).

The Sword Swallower was by far the most legitimate act of the festival. Every time he would take a sword down, you could visibly see fear in the crowd, many seemed afraid he would not survive. When he drove a nail into his nose with a hammer, not a single audience member could stay in their seats. Then when he began to walk around the room with the nail still in his head and asked for money, he was hard to deny.

He gave a false name but said he had picked up the art of sword swallowing while being a clown in a circus. It took him six months of training before he got his first sword down without gagging. He said the biggest hazards of his profession are the risk of ulcers caused by tears in his stomach lining and damage to his vocal cords.

The jousting tournament arena was filled with 4,000 screaming fans all cheering "cheat to win" and "bad guys rule." It was the Black Knights vs. the Red Knights in a joust a l'Outrance (to the death). The jousters were actually professional stuntmen hired to fight all over the country. They were even wired so the crowd could here the dialogue.

"Indeed, I choose to fight by way of battle-ax, and I don't mean your wife," Sir Andrew said.

"Well my lord, I choose to fight by way of ball and chain and I do mean your wife," responded Sir Charles.

The battle that followed was very violent and intentionally gruesome, which pleased the crowd. A man who looked about 60 made a move to get a closer look when suddenly a woman blasted him with a verbal assault laced with expletives because her son could no longer see. All the man was able to reply with was, "You started it, so why don't you move." Then the women said, "You're a sick old man to get in the way of a child." Her husband, who was decked out in very chivalrous duds, opted to keep with his '90s male attitude and stayed out of the altercation. If this had been during the middle ages you could rest assured that a sword fight would have followed. For anyone on the fence about whether viewing violence has an affect on the audience, let this be a defining moment.

Right before I left I was told "If you hit the Renaissance Festival in just the right mood, you can escape to another time place." Maybe he meant you can get so drunk at the festival, you won't even remember the time and place.