Bushnell's book, humor miss the mark

Here's what we have: Sex and the City is a collection of articles originally written for the New York Observer. In them Candy chronicles the sad and sordid world of dating in the big city. Not just any big city. For Candy, it's New York or nothin'. Which makes for a very insular and clique-ish kind of book. Which I didn't like.

My main problem is that Candy is no Cynthia Heimel, but she thinks she is. Heimel, who currently writes the "Women" column for Playboy, is a hell of a gal. And funny. Candy tries to be funny. Here's an example of her riotous humor:

"'He's like Daryl Van Horne in The Witches of Eastwick.'

"'Van Horny is more like it,' said another."

Hee hee hee. Get it? Not Van Horn, Van Horny! Oh, save me before she quips again!

Apparently, Candy also thinks that her sly covers for real-life famous people are witty and clever. There may even be attempts at satire. Try this:

"There was just the slightest stir as 'Gregory Roque,' the conspiracy filmmaker, slipped into the Bowery Bar on a recent Friday night. The author of such controversial films as 'G.R.F.' (Gerald Rudolph Ford) and 'The Monkeys' ..." Again with the rapier wit! Who could she be talking about (nudge, wink, vomit?)

And it goes on and on. All the men in New York are idiots and jerks. All the women are increasingly desperate and gossipy. Even famous people aren't happy. At one point, some men of Candy's acquaintance make some very disturbing and offensive revelations on men's opinions of "pretty" girls versus "interesting" (read "not pretty") girls. For example, pretty girls won't let you have sex with the TV on, while not-pretty girls will, because they're grateful that the guy isn't looking at them. And sex with a not-pretty girl is fun because the guy doesn't have to worry about impressing them. But you can't take a not-pretty girl out, so all you can really do is watch videos and have sex. And talk, but who really wants that?

But the Candy-figure in the book, Carrie, is not not-pretty. She's very pretty and winds up in a not-perfect but pleasant relationship with Mr. Big. To tell you the truth, Carrie is just about the most obnoxious figure in the book. First she wants to get married, then she's scared she'll turn into a Connecticut wife. First she wants a baby, then she's afraid she'll miss all the fun. First she feels like a nut, then she doesn't.

Maybe, though, Sex in the City does reflect and replicate the dating scene in New York. After living vicariously through these people for more than 200 pages, I felt dirty and abandoned, my faith in humanity shattered. So I should fit right in.