By Lesley-Ann Kilgore and Heather Laine
UA advertising hides ugly truths
Due to the recent trend in truth of advertising, we feel it necessary to rewrite the UA student brochure. Instead of the current pictures of lucious lawns on which students may study and sunbathe, there should be photographs of cement flooring with gum, mucous, spit, mud, and water. Instead of emphasizing the beautiful sunny weather, that is indicitive of Arizona, the brochure should reveal its plans of building an underground coffin in which the incoming freshman are to be doomed to never see sunlight again. Instead of labeling the educational opportunities offered at the university as helping the individual climb the ladder of success to the sky, perhaps the university should take it down a notch and strive to look at its own ceiling with wires and mildew clinging to the remnants of stucco tile. Instead of advertising the richness of activities available on campus, we should include the fire marshall's statement of why Gallagher can so easily turn into a fireball of hell. Finally, instead of arguing the benefits of a low-cost, well-respected state institution, the university should argue the democratic benefits of being able to vote on ad-hoc spending resolutions that allow the university to spend millions of dollars in areas of which the students have no control. It's just a thought.