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Don't be mean to Steve
To the editor: I'm afraid the line has to be drawn. Now, I looked the other way when certain comic strips portrayed seeing-eye reptiles and alternative-lifestyle arthropods in a manner that, although ambiguous, was found offensive by several readers. I even openly defended the editors and authors of the respective strips and praised their artistic testes (for lack of a less vulgar or gender-specific adjective). But I am afraid I can do no such thing anymore. I am writing in response to the October 19 Wildcat, in particular to the comic strip "Wolf and Pig," in which the masculinity of a heroic - and fairly handsome, I might add - prince is put into question because his name is Steve. It is comments such as this that have caused me severe emotional trauma for many years now. My trouble began for the most part when I was quite a bit younger and was forced to watch "Steel Magnolias" with my mom and my aunts. As every single woman reader will recall, there is a line which specifically states that all men with the name Steve are inherently homosexual. The laughter from my relatives that followed caused me to do some serious soul searching and questioning of my own sexuality. To this day I have not been able to watch the fine cinematic performance, an action that has caused much turmoil in my pursuit to disguise my homosexual tendencies with which this film has diagnosed me. Many of my relationships with women have fallen to shambles because of my inability to watch it with them. Since then I have tried desperately to search for a Steve in the media that can be completely exempt of any incling of homosexuality. In Hollywood there is Steve Martin and Steve Guttenberg, neither of which could be definitively be marked as masculine (my evidence consists of "The Three Amigos" and "Three Men and a Baby," which I think are examples enough). Then I turned to pro sports, with the obvious choice of Steve Young, quarterback for the 49ers. Oh wait, isn't that the San Francisco 49ers? This brings me back to the comic strip. Such intense emotional distress over the years has climaxed with this clever, yet highly hate-motivated and prejudiced piece of art. I hope this shall be the first and last incident of anti-Steve propaganda at this fine institution.
Steve Miller |
