Expanding your dating pool

Tanith L. Balaban Arizona Daily Wildcat An associate professor of psychology speaks about her intercultural relationship at a forum on interracial and intercultural relationships yesterday in the Student Union. (From left) humanities professor Bella Zweig, Olga Carranza, associate director of education, outreach and programming for the department of multicultural programs and services, and Michael Rohrbaugh, professor of psychology and family studies, listen.

"There are more intercultural marriages in parts of the world where there are less intercultural problems," Michael Rohrbaugh said during a forum on interracial and intercultural relationships held in the Memorial Student Union Rincon Room.

"Statistically, the odds are against" intercultural couples succeeding, Rohrbaugh said. But for those that "make it, there is a lot more richness to be had."

Rohrbaugh, one of four speakers who have had intercultural relationships, shared his experiences at the forum, sponsored by the University Activities Board Eye on Diversity Committee.

Humanities professor Bella Zweig agreed with Rohrbaugh's theory on the benefits of attempting to understand other cultures by dating.

"There's something very positive about being interested in people of other (ethnic) groups," Zweig said.

Most Americans, in fact, are products of intercultural marriages, associate psychology professor Laura McCloskey said.

"Intercultural dating is the building block of present American society," she said. "Just about everyone has different ethnic backgrounds."

Still, there are many difficulties an intercultural couple must overcome, she said.

The barrage of "stigmatized responses" from friends and family who are uncomfortable with intercultural relationships combined with "actual" cultural differences often lead couples to the break up, McCloskey said.

During her relationship with an Asian man, McCloskey, who is white, said her friends did not find him attractive or sexy.

"People really do need to follow their hearts and not listen to often shallow recommendations of friends and family," she said.

Zweig, who is Jewish, said she had a similar experience.

While dating an American Indian man, "we were treated quite differently" in stores and restaurants, she said. It was "what's usually called 'subtle' racism."

"I did not feel the racism of the U.S. until I became involved with a person of different color," Zweig said. "Then I really got insight into how racism works in America."

Rearing children is another issue that can cause intercultural-relationship friction, said Olga Carranza, associate director of education, outreach and programming for the department of multicultural programs and services.

Teaching children religion and cultural customs can also cause problems, Carranza said.

Most criticisms of intercultural relationships, however, are derived from fear, Zweig said.

"It's people's fear of something different than what they're used to," she said. "If we recognize it's other people's fears, it may make it easier to deal with."

Anyone interested in starting an intercultural relationship can enter a contest sponsored by the University Activities Board.

Ten couples will be matched for an evening of "Cosmic Bowling" at Lucky Strike Bowling on East Speedway Boulevard, said Harminder Singh, chairman of the Eye on Diversity Committee.

"If you enter, you're in," said Singh, a biology senior.

Those who are interested can pick up forms in Student Union Room 101.

Michael Lafleur can be reached via e-mail at Michael.Lafleur@wildcat.arizona.edu.