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Smackdown!

Last week, the United States Congress was party to a plea from Minnesota Rep. Jesse "The Body" Ventura for granting permanent normal trade relations with China. The move was a means for the Clinton administration to gain more popular support for the legislation. Pardon me, but these are dark times when our nation's president has to lobby the aid of a former pro-wrestler in order to pass foreign affairs legislation, especially on a nation seeking full trade rights given their history of human rights abuses.

Clinton is employing Ventura as a weak ploy. He's been on a legislation rampage in the last year, attempting to construct a stable presidency beyond personal manure and policy blemishes. Of late, the primarily domestic-minded leader has turned to foreign interests like China. Noting the weak support for allowing China to gain permanent trading relations, he turned to Rep. Jesse Ventura. Ventura, a.k.a. "The Body," is known for his straightforward style of politics - a style that mimics his farcical wrestling style. God save us.

For those of you not aware of any reason that we might not want China to have full trade rights with the United States, let me set out a short history lesson. First and foremost is China's human rights track record. Considering nothing else, the massacre of millions of peaceful Tibetans since 1950, which continues today, is reason enough to discipline the government. This isn't even mentioning the horrific factory conditions of today.

Factory conditions will only worsen by opening up trade with China. American companies will jump at the opportunity to employ cheaper labor in China, taking jobs away from Americans while exploiting the Chinese. Ventura quivered not at this proposition, saying that "If they're our corporations, it's our job to look after them, right?" Puh-lease! The United States is one of just two nations in the United Nations not to sign the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. The other is China. Bad habits die hard, huh?

Congress, sadly enough, supported "The Body" in his rant for China trade rights as Rep. William Thomas, R-Calif., told the associated press that he "thought it was a body-slam." Even non-wrestling legislators are excited by the thought of getting behind such a name. Ventura is not a real politician. His straightforward politics are great for local politics, but not for foreign relations.

Picture the table of diplomats: Jiang Zemin, Clinton, Albright, Ventura, and Judge Mills Lane off to the side chiming in: "China. U.S. Let's get it on!" Who in the hell thought of this as a good idea?

Sending Jesse "The Body" as our lead diplomat and paper pusher in on Chinese relations is ludicrous. To make the whole thing more clear take this mirror situation: a former Sumo wrestler, fake no less, is appointed as the critical voice for U.S. affairs from China. How does that look? Everything about this is as farcical as Ventura's former "sport."

Ventura disagrees. "We don't have to approve of their human rights record to help improve them," he told the associated press. "Opening the doors to our business practices, our culture and our democratic ideas will open their process." What "process" he was referring to is unclear, but evidently he's nearly as obtuse. Those flying shots to the head off the top rope must have been real. Either that or the 'roids he employed to get the name "The Body" have screwed him up so bad that he's degenerated into nothing more than a puppet.

It matters not why he's so ill-educated as to the complexity of U.S.-China foreign trade relations. Ventura left the Reform Party to be a Clinton administration puppet for the means of passing foreign legislation. China is a nation of over a billion people. This is not a weak issue that just anyone can be put on. Perhaps our legislators would be better suited determining international policy in a professional manner rather than over chicken wings and watching Monday Night Raw.

U.S. policy makers need to decide how to approach the trade question with China appropriately. Clinton wants to be heralded as the progenitor of Asian-produced wealth for the U.S., but I'd rather see it done right without a WWF nutcase. Leave politics to the politicians.