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Hamlet, graduating philosophy senior

From Hamlet

Prince of Denmark

Graduating philosophy senior

Year IV, semester II

To be here, or not to be here; that is the question:

Whether 'tis stupider to get a degree

That brings no acceptance and outrageous fortune

Or to study a discipline with no personal interest

And enter a life unfulfilled? To sleep: To study;

No more; and by not studying to say we end

The stomach-ache of the thousand worrying tests

That college is heir to, 'tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wish'd. To study: To work;

To work: perchance freedom from school: ay, where's the pub;

For in that drink of death your dreams may return

From the dreary sadness that is of mortal life,

That makes one hush: there's the disrespect

That makes banality of so long life;

For who would care of the dismal and pointless of society,

The top-40 songs, the power brokers' cruelty,

The chains of credit card, the lawyer's deceitful display,

The cubicles of office and the spurns

That merit coffee and little pastry cakes,

When one might need the sugar intake

With a dose of asprin? who but poets care,

Of that grunt and sweat of everyday life,

But that dread of something after college,

The undiscover'd dormitory from whose bourn

Few alumni return, stifles the thrill

And makes one rather bear University life

Than try another road that few students know of?

Thus conscience does make all pee their pants;

And thus the bleary television resolution

Is sickled over with shows comprised of little thought

And enterprises one to a apathy and little movement

With no regard to the current events of today,

And become one potato of couching - Not me now!

The fair diploma! Paper, in thy delicately-printed text

Be all my schooling remember'd.