By Rebekah Jampole
Arizona Daily Wildcat
Monday September 30, 2002
Experienced CatTran driver speaks about orangutans, hot coffee, minor accidents, death and being stepped on in life
WILDCAT: How long have you been doing this?
CHICO: What, at the university?
CHICO: Going on four years.
WILDCAT: So you drive around all the lazy kids on campus?
CHICO: Yeah, but they are always welcome to a ride.
WILDCAT: Well, that's nice of you.
CHICO: Yeah, well, we just provide service.
WILDCAT: Can anyone have a ride?
CHICO: As long as they are well-behaved.
WILDCAT: Can a wild pack of orangutan have a ride?
CHICO: As long as they follow UA procedures: No drinking, smoking or eating in the shuttle.
WILDCAT: That's very important.
CHICO: Oh, I think it is. Because if they have coffee, they might spill it on a passenger or on themselves.
WILDCAT: But that could be a good thing. You know that old lady sued McDonalds because she spilled their coffee on herself. She got quite a bit of money. Maybe you should let them bring coffee on the shuttle; you could make out like a bandit.
CHICO: Never, never, never.
WILDCAT: How many people have you hit with the shuttle?
CHICO: None, never an accident. I'm too cautious. I've had minor ones.
WILDCAT: So you just kinda hit someone, or did they run into your shuttle?
CHICO: No, like the door jamming, small little things like that ö acts of God.
WILDCAT: Once I ran my car into a wall, well actually, it ran itself into a wall. I forgot to put it in park while it was still on. That was just a little accident, right?
CHICO: Yeah, just a minor one.
WILDCAT: So, if you were to become an insect, what would you be and why?
CHICO: I'd rather be dead. They're going to step on me anyway.