On the spot

By Claire C. Laurence
Arizona Daily Wildcat
Friday, January 23, 2004

Lab manager wears pink shoelaces, but not on the advice of the crazy alien Zorak

Wildcat: I'm from the Daily Wildcat and I'm on the spot-ing, if that's a word. It is now.

Dreisbach: Really? Wow.

Wildcat: So, are you a researcher here in Old Chem?

Dreisbach: No, I'm a building manager.

Wildcat: So you haven't blown anything up lately?

Dreisbach: No, I'm here to put out the fires.

Wildcat: So what's the craziest explosion you've ever had to deal with?

Dreisbach: I think it'd have to be the time when the guy forgot to pull the pin on the fire extinguisher.

Wildcat: And it blew?

Dreisbach: There was an explosion, and when he squeezed the handle it melted into his hand. (laughing) Did you know that you have a big piece of metal above your eye?

Wildcat: Yes, I receive messages from outer space with it. Would you like to talk to my leader?

Dreisbach: Ha-ha! No! What is his name, Zorak or something?

Wildcat: Oh, so you know him? Does he talk to you, too? What does he tell you to do?

Dreisbach: He tells me to uh ... uh ... just keep smiling and makes me look like an idiot.

Wildcat: So did Zorak also tell you to take down your drapes and make them into a shirt?

Dreisbach: No, this (shirt) is direct from the '70s. I'm not making a statement; it's just my regular clothes.

Wildcat: So you just haven't bought any clothing in 30 years?

Dreisbach: That's right, I haven't, and I dress in the dark.

Wildcat: Do your socks match?

Dreisbach: No, and my shoelaces are pink.

Passing Student: His socks NEVER match.

Dreisbach: And the bottom of my socks are about the color of my dirty driveway.

Wildcat: Well, you keep talking to Zorak and maybe he can give you some fashion advice.

Dreisbach: Thanks, I will.