What can be said about hair that hasn't been said before? It's important? Well, it protects our heads from all kinds of calamities: low branches, the hot Arizona sun, bird poop.
After all, the existence of hair has been a pivotal part of our human history. The cave men pulled the cave women by it during the Ice Age. Rapunsel let her man climb up it for wild nights of tower partying and fairy tale sex. Even today, don't we judge all politicians by the size and greatness of their hair? (So why didn't Kerry win then?)
With all these things going on, hair has to be important! It has functional and historical impact, but more important than everything else, it looks pretty cool in a weave.
Well, sometimes I guess. Not every person can pull off the weave. There are some unfortunate individuals out there that just need to be told for once in their lives that the weave is definitely not for them. Their moms won't do it. Their girlfriends' dogs won't do it. And definitely not their significant others, for gosh darn!
A completely unscientific poll with Leslie Haws, the manager at the Great Clips in the Student Union Memorial Center, reveals locks (get it, sounds like lots!) about hair's twists, turns and curls this season. Right now, women's hair fashion is all about layers.
Students with longer hair choose the layers to give them more volume, while the others want layers to give their hair a flippy look. Tresses from stars such as Lindsey Lohan and Hillary Duff are among the most sought-after in the biz and at the Union, Haws said.
As for men, classic pop stars like John Lennon look a little better than today's faire. Although most guys don't come in with a picture under their arm and a dream in their hearts, they still have ideas about what they want their hair to look like.
This season, the ideas are somewhere along the lines of a shaggy or moppy cut; kind of like the Beatles. If not, the hair is short, messy and/or spikey on the top. You know, that just-woke-up look.
Seems simple enough, but you'll be surprised how many people think they can break the rules. Going against the herd isn't necessarily a bad thing, as long as the individual has enough style and pizazz to pull it off. For example, Chelsea Hiscox, elementary music education senior, prefers long locks to layered ones.
With hair that looks like it's over three feet long, Hiscox is quite a sight to the sore eye. Her straight brown motif makes her look more like a Medeival princess than somebody on Lizzy Maguire. Surprisingly, it's pretty low maintenance.
Instead of wasting hours with a hair dryer and a curling iron every morning, she just washes it at night and then lets it dry in her sleep, putting her hair up in French braids whenever she gets tired of it flowing around her face.
But why would somebody choose a hair style like that in the first place? "I'm just really used to it and I've never grown tired of it," Hiscox said.
Matt Campbell, political science sophomore, prefers to keep his hair short. But unlike most guys, he keeps it up. Campbell spends about 45 minutes every morning blow drying, flat ironing and putting "disgusting amounts of product" in his hair. Not to mention, he dies it a different color every three to five months.
"It never changes too much. It'll go black and red. Usually it's black and something," Campbell said.
This is a strict opposite to Alyssa Hoyt, a studio arts freshman who also has short colored hair. Although she puts it up in a Mohawk, it still only takes her five minutes or less every morning to style.
"Usually I use wax or whatever and just kinda mess it around," Hoyt said. She dyes her hair a different color about every two months. She has had purple, brown, red, platinum blonde and orange in her coif over the years.
But Hoyt never worries that this may look unprofessional.
"My profession is in the arts, so people are pretty accepting of originality," she said. "My friend has a mohawk also and people always comment on it. And it's usually nice or a kind of a funny 'way to go.'"
It looks like she has found a positive way to express herself. Now if only we could work on those weaves.