By
Ryan Finley
Dear freshmen, or freshwomen, or freshpeople. Whatever.
I know I am one of about 3,000 people to give try to give you some advice prepare to enter college, the scariest, most frustrating and (I bet you've never heard this before!) best time of your life. The University of Arizona, with its 50,000 students, large dorms and impersonal classroom settings, can be a scary place. Here's how to get through in four years without spending your Friday and Saturday nights in the library.
1) Here's a shocker: go to class! I know it sounds stupid, but most people that actually fail out of college do so because they refuse to roll out of bed in the morning. I was the worst. During the first semester of my freshman year, I got a 1.6 grade point average and almost dropped out of school. Why? Primarily it was because I slept through alarm clocks, took three (sometimes four)-day weekends, watched too much SportsCenter early in the morning, and partied a bit too hard. Not everyone can get straight-A's in school, but anyone - anyone! - can show up to class everyday. The next semester, I made it a point to wake up for classes, even when I knew that I would be back asleep the second I got there. Guess what? My GPA doubled. Remember, this isn't high school and you can't talk your way out of everything. Most professors don't want to hear excuses but, for the most part, they don't want to fail anybody either. Most professors (unless they're Mr. Hand from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High) will admit they don't fail students that show up and pretend to care. They will, without a doubt, flunk somebody who doesn't give a damn. If you don't care, they won't care. So wake up!
2) Buy football tickets. I don't care if you hate football: get them anyway. It's just like high school - people go to games to see, be seen, and figure out what's going on after the game. And let's not kid ourselves here: this is Tucson and - unless you have a great fake I.D., - you'll be watching the E! True Hollywood Story and drinking malt liquor in the dorms, anyway. At least by going to games, you get a little fresh air. Take it from a former sportswriter: we'll be pretty good this year. You might as well be there. In college, school pride is a good thing to have.
3) Go crazy · on the weekends. You'll hear this from everyone before you start school, but it's good advice nonetheless: do everything in moderation. Where people (me included) ruin themselves is when they start to find excuses to drink, smoke and go crazy on a Tuesday night because there's nothing to do. So cut loose and go nuts, but do it on the weekends. This just in - Wednesday morning hangovers lead to missing classes and nobody wants to do that. Just see rule No. 1.
4) Get a job, you lazy bum! I know I sound like my dad, but getting a job during school is one of the best things you can do. Some of my friends get a fat check from their parents every month because mom and dad think that work will take away from (get this!) studying. While it's a great concept, we all know that doesn't happen. Unless you're a cellular and molecular biology student who's working part time as a rocket scientist, work hardly gets in the way of school. In fact, working teaches you how to budget your time, multitask and succeed among people who are unbelievably different than you. Aside from doing this whole newspaper thing, I wait tables at a local Mexican restaurant. It's a great fit for me - I work with people who I would never have known otherwise. And I'll tell you what: nothing makes me want to succeed more than the fear that I may end up spending the rest of my life getting yelled at by customers who want their chimichangas NOW.
5) Get involved. Find something you like to do - play intramurals, join a club, join student council, or even join the greek system - whatever floats your boat. The more people you know, the more classes you will go to: it's a proven fact. Even if you have a regular poker game with the guys in the dorms (like I did), find something to do. The more you're doing, the less you're stuck in your room acting like a loser. And who knows? You might find that special someone in the process.
6) Stay away from the credit card people. Life is hard enough with all the bills you will have to pay. A credit card bill is just another headache. If you need one, use it on bills only.
7) Do something that you can tell your kids about someday. Go to a midnight sale at Zip's Music. Take a trip to Nogales, Sonora and buy some fake Oakleys. Jog at the rec center. Throw a party. Spend a night watching a movie or playing video games with your friends. Have a guys'/girls' night out. Spend $20 on a nice cigar. Enter a softball league. Buy a cowboy hat. Watch the sun set from the roof of the Cherry Garage. Come to blows over politics. Drive up to Mt. Lemmon on a Sunday afternoon for a slice of pie in weather that's a good 35 degrees colder than it is here. Drive around town looking for the cheapest burrito. Take someone special to Gate's Pass. Break into an apartment complex and jump in the jacuzzi. See a concert at Old Tucson. College flies by and your freshman year is the last time you'll likely have this much freedom. So do what you want to do.
8) College takes four (or five or six) years - take your time. College is fun, but everyone knows the one person their freshman year who decides to party all the time. That person is normally out of school in a semester. Don't allow yourself to get too high or too low. Life won't end if you don't get that girl or if you fail a midterm. Play it cool - there's no need to become a psycho over it. Don't be "that guy."
9) Know your options. The day I learned to love this place is the day that I realized that I could go somewhere else if I wanted to. College isn't like high school - you don't HAVE to stay somewhere if you don't want to. For most of us, college is a luxury that our parents pay out the ears for. Don't waste their money and your time. College is great because you have no obligation to stay. If you don't like school, leave. It's no big deal.
10) Stay away from my sister. Sure, she'll be a freshman at the University of Nevada-Las Vegas in the fall, but nobody better head up there and touch her. Got me?
