By
The Wildcat Opinions Board
After four years as reigning champs, ASU finally managed to beat us at something. In the annual ASU versus UA blood drive, ASU stole our crimson crown by bringing in 1,081 pints of blood. We only managed to draw out 1,019 pints of blood. Think that's bad? Last year, we donated 1,455 pints of blood to the Red Cross. This year's total was about 70 percent of that.
Never fear, UA fans, we needn't relinquish the title just yet. The American Red Cross, Greek Life and Kappa Sigma fraternity house have come up with a plan. The blood drive has been extended one week so that we could try to erase the pint deficit. Tomorrow, at the Kappa Sigma fraternity house, 1423 E. First St., Red Cross volunteers will collect more blood from anyone willing to offer up their arms. Be there.
Of course, ASU is whining something about how they've won fair and square and we're cheating.
"As far as I knew, this was all advertised as a one-week challenge, meaning when the week is over the challenge is over. I hope that their drive goes well, but I will be speaking to my manager regarding the addition of the numbers to their total," said Sylvia Klausnik, community relations representative for the United Blood Services and the person who collected donors at ASU.
Talk to your manager, no one likes a tattle-tale. And no one likes ASU, at least not down here in Wildcat Country.
Oh wah-wah, boo-hoo. Sure, ASU is miffed. ASU is miffed when the final horn sounds every year at the end of our annual basketball confrontation. ASU is miffed when US News and World Report publishes its annual colleges rankings. Suck it up, losers!
We, on the other hand, are not losers. We are cheaters. And if you think that cheaters never prosper, think again. Not only will we prosper, we will whup ASU in this blood drive. What's more is that not only will we prosper, but the Tucson community will benefit as well. All the blood donated stays in the community and goes to needy patients here.
We are cheating, but we are doing it for a good cause, beating ASU. And donating much-needed blood to the Red Cross. Call us cheaters ASU, we don't care. In this case, it's a badge we wear with pride.
So whine all you want, ASU. Sounds like sour grapes to us. We can whup your tails any day! Oh, wait, we lost the blood drive didn't we? Don't make us and the Red Cross and Kappa Sigma look like fools.
Donate blood tomorrow. Donate more than the measly 70 pints we need to meet our drive goal and cream ASU for the fifth year in a row.
