By
Shaun Clayton
Arizona Daily Wildcat
With the "Bear Down" fight song playing every time the clock strikes noon on campus, perhaps now would be a good time to point out that the marching band is a silly, anachronistic piece of fluff - and it needs to go.
First of all, the marching band is not what people come to see when they watch a football game. Marching bands, as a rule, do not stand on their own as an event to watch. If the marching band truly was something to watch on its own, one would think it would be part of the ticket draw, and advertised along with the football teams:
"This Sunday, come see the 'Pride of Arizona' marching band play the tunes you know and love! Oh, and the Wildcats are, um, playing some team from Texas."
Further, bands at football games have long been made obsolete through the invention of audio technology - stadiums now have the ability to broadcast music through the sound system without any trouble at all.
There is also the fact that a recording of a song done by the original band almost always sounds better than the rendition done by the marching band. Somehow, David Gilmour's guitar solos from Pink Floyd's "Run Like Hell" just don't sound the same coming from the marching band's brass section.
Of course, there is the physical presence of a band on the field that technology cannot yet duplicate and is not likely to be able to anytime soon. The combination of playing a musical instrument while walking in formation takes skill, but it's not something to e-mail the neighbors about. It's like getting excited over how well someone can belch the alphabet.
Also, even when the band doesn't move, the marching band uniforms look like Las Vegas showgirl hand-me-downs that not even Siegfried and Roy would wear around the house. It is difficult to understand why any band member would want to wear something that makes them look like undignified toys.
Perhaps it's the "T-word" that makes them want to do it - tradition. Frankly, just because something is traditional doesn't mean it's a good idea. Case in point, the events surrounding Groundhog Day.
Yes, Groundhog Day, where people try to predict the weather by watching the shadow of an oversized rat. Accepting something just on the basis of tradition is like accepting the annual appearance of an alcoholic uncle who always drinks too much brandy at Christmas dinner, makes a pass at another family member and falls face down unconscious in the lime Jell-O.
Lastly, though, some might say that marching bands bring joy and happiness to those who participate in them and thus, it is not for one to judge the merit of any activity that makes a person happy. Then again, Jeffrey Dahmer did eat people and that made him happy - just something to think about.
