Duke Schechter political science junior

WILDCAT: What are you majoring in?

SCHECHTER: Political science.

WILDCAT: Why did you pick political science?

SCHECHTER: Because we've already proven that any anal sphincter can be president. I figure as Chief Justice of the Supremes, I might be able to accomplish something.

WILDCAT: Okay. Did you have a good summer?

SCHECHTER: No, I lost my job and I took two courses here.

WILDCAT: I'm so sorry.

SCHECHTER: That's okay, it's not your fault. It happens.

WILDCAT: Were you excited to come back, get things started, back on a roll and into the swing of things again?

SCHECHTER: I don't do excited. I'm looking forward to getting it accomplished.

WILDCAT: How much longer do you have?

SCHECHTER: About a year-and-a-half and then law school.

WILDCAT: Oh wow!

SCHECHTER: Well, when you reach my age, it's time to decide what you want to be when you grow up. You're never too old to have a happy childhood.

WILDCAT: Good to know. If you had to be a banana split, what flavor ice cream would you be? And what kind of toppings would you put on yourself, and why?

SCHECHTER: Assorted flavors and every topping available. Except for anything having peanut butter in it.

WILDCAT: Everything? Why everything?

SCHECHTER: Variety is the spice of life. That's why you can have more than one spouse and it's known as having spice.