By Rebekah Jampole
Arizona Daily Wildcat
Tuesday December 3, 2002
Undeclared freshman knows not much but nuts can top a rainy day and a rocky road
WILDCAT: So why the crap are you eating ice cream right now? It is so dang cold.
QUAIN: It's not that cold, first of all, and second of all, it's good.
WILDCAT: It is good. I have a friend who can eat gallons of ice cream on his own. He has this contest with this girl every week where they race to see who can eat a large amount of ice cream the fastest. Crazy, huh?
QUAIN: That is insane.
WILDCAT: I know. I think my esophagus would freeze. Anyway, what's your favorite type of ice cream?
QUAIN: Chocolate chip cookie dough.
WILDCAT: Mine too. I like this girl. If you were to be a banana split, what type of ice cream and toppings would you be, and why?
QUAIN: Rocky road, chocolate cookie dough and mint chocolate chip. Oh, and toppings, oops. Nuts.
WILDCAT: Now, is this representative of your personality? Are you a little kooky or nuts?
QUAIN: Yeah.
WILDCAT: And why the rocky road? Is that representative of the trials and tribulations you have faced in your many years of life?
QUAIN: No, it's because the marshmallows are all smooth and I like chocolate.
WILDCAT: Nice. So, what do you think about the rain?
QUAIN: It's nice.
WILDCAT: Are you from Arizona?
QUAIN: No. Yes. Wait · yes.
WILDCAT: It's not rocket science. Can I help you out, there? Just kidding. So, before I started this interview, I told you I wouldn't ask you what you thought about President Bush's time as president so far, but what do you think about his hair?
QUAIN: I don't know. He's old. It's gray.
WILDCAT: Don't you think he should do it all spiky? You know, to be modern and hip?
QUAIN: Yeah, so he can try to get along with the fellow...
WILDCAT: Other countries with spiky hair?
QUAIN: Yeah.