Photo courtesy of Paramount Jack Black stars in "School of Rock," as a loser musician who can't get any respect. He's also in Tenacious D, a band where he acts like a loser musician trying to get respect. He's also Jack Black, an actor who has trouble getting respect because he always plays loser musicians.

Jack Black schools audiences in the history of rock

Jack Black is everywhere these days. Seems within the last week or so he has been on every cable and network station pumping out answers to

journalists and TV show hosts about his new lead in "School Of Rock." Even the once-sacred bastion of MTV music videos has been invaded by the Black one and his quest to spread the "School" news.

Tossing the risk of overexposure out of his media-shagging wagon, he has even marked his territory on college newspapers.

Black fielded a tremendous range of questions from student journalists Friday. Some dealt with the new movie, others dealt with sexual appendage size in relation to how hard a person rocks.

"I got news for you, buddy: two inches fully erect," Black said. "I've seen it. I wish I had a smaller dick so I could rock harder than I do. Mine is small, but not small enough."

It's a good thing the size of the boat does not seem to matter in Hollywood. Black is getting rave reviews for his portrayal of fourth-grade substitute teacher Dewey Finn. It's a role that writer Mike White ("Orange County," "The Good Girl") penned specifically for the hyperactive funnyman.

"It's like Mike wrote this script, and if the script was a car, it's like he pulled it up in a Ferrari that was built for me," he said. "So I mean, I got in it and I was like: ÎI know how to drive this thing. I know what I'm going to do. I'm going to take it over some bunny hops. I'm going to floor it and push the nitro button that you didn't even know about under the dash.'"

Along with Black and White, Director Richard Linklater ("Dazed And Confused," "Waking Life") became the third amigo.

"I thought we were a great team, the three of us," Black said. "I'd love to work with them again."

Adding to the mix is the cast of talented children that join Black's schoolhouse rock. And if you are wondering about the authenticity of the band, all the kids in the movie played their own instruments.

"We hired kids that were kind of protŽgŽs because if you're ten-years-old and you can really play, you're pretty much a protŽgŽ, as far as I'm concerned," he said.

Having the small fries around on the set didn't change Black's intensity.

"I couldn't drop any f-bombs, but I had a good time," he said. "I brought the hard rock."

From where does he grasp his signature intensity take-after-take?

"I pull it from deep within the mind of the superfreak," he said.

On the superfreak's exterior are his super expressive eyebrows. These famed brows are something Black goes to great lengths to keep in top physical condition.

"I inject my eyebrows with steroids," he said. "No, I do lift weights with them. I mean I clip on some one-pound weight to each eyebrow and just lift. I'm power lifting every morning. Then I get a deep tissue eyebrow massage for about two hours every afternoon. And then I have someone come in and wax them."

As possible eyebrow workout music, Black said there are a few bands that make the inspiration possible.

"My major music influences are ABBA, what you may call Simon & Garfunkel, and Black Sabbath," he said. "Did you get that? Don't misquote me. I will hunt you down on my Harley of Death."

He later revealed some darker musical indulgences circa high school.

"I also liked Bobby McFerrin; don't ask me why," he said. "I don't want to talk about it."

Sadly, Black's character in "School" does worry and is not happy. After getting kicked out of his band, he becomes disillusioned with the current state of rock În' roll music. Likewise, Black is also in a fickle with the current rock scene.

"I don't think it's sucky and shitty as much as it's just there are no real gods of rock anymore ÷ right now, anyway," he said. "I think it might be because the world seems like it's about to end, and there seems like bigger fish to fry than worshipping musicians. Do you know what I mean? Like music has to take a backseat when the world is about to explode because of religion and all these horrible things that are happening."

Luckily Black doesn't just sit back and complain about rock music, he contributes with his comedy partner, Kyle G ass, in the form of the band Tenacious D. Black just got through writing the script for the feature film currently titled: "Tenacious D in ÎThe Pick Of Destiny.'" Black said he hopes to have it out by the end of 2004 or early 2005.

In the meantime, he is just going to enjoy the rock star/movie star life with Tenacious D's many groupies. Or lack thereof.

"Kyle is single so he puts them all in a cage," Black said. "Then he puts the cage in his compound ranch, and he lets them out one at a time and he feeds them ÷ I don't know. We don't really have groupies. I don't know if you've ever seen Tenacious D? It's mostly sausage in the audience. We're heroes to all fat dudes everywhere."