Hattie Sabia, sociology and African American studies senior, and Sarah Dixon, microbiology sophomore, want the same things other girls may want out of life - a nice home and children. The only problem is that, legally, they can't get married.

Sabia and Dixon, both lesbians, have been together for five months. They became friends through social events with the Bisexual Gay and Lesbian Association.

"I asked her out at least three times," Sabia said. "Finally, on the third time, she accepted."

That night, Sabia said that she had butterflies in her stomach, much like most other people's first dates.

Sabia "came out" this past March to her family, seven months after she finally admitted to herself that she was a lesbian.

"I've always known I was different, but it went a step further when I noticed that I paid attention to girls," she said. "My dad took it pretty well. The only negative thing he said was 'I guess I'll never have grand kids.' Everybody has a different justification for that."

Dixon's mother decided that "it was just a phase. But now, she's well past it, and actually, she's Hattie and my biggest fan," Dixon said.

Her father, however, was fine when Dixon first told him her sophomore year of high school. "But when I became active in the community, he backed off because he ran the risk of people knowing that his daughter was gay."

Dixon said that her father is not supportive of her being gay, but he is supportive of her as a person.

Because Sabia and Dixon are open about their sexuality, they say they are more of a target for discrimination than other people. They both believe that Tucson is more accepting of gays than Phoenix.

"We sometimes get funny looks as we walk down the Mall holding hands, but mostly people are pretty cool about it," Dixon said.

The Senate's approval of the Defense of Marriage Act and the rejection of an anti-discrimination employment bill has angered Sabia and Dixon.

"I think it is the stupidest piece of legislation that the U.S. has put forward," Sabia said.

"We in the U.S. have always declared equality for all," she said. "Another religion can say 'I don't want to pledge to the flag,' but we can't say that we want to be with the same sex."

Dixon, who is black, said she faces another problem. "My biggest fear is that I'll be bashed by the black community for being gay, and bashed again by the black gay community for dating a white woman."

No matter what happens, though, Sabia and Dixon plan on staying together. They plan to have a "commitment ceremony" in June and move to Virginia afterward.

"I had this belief that just once in my lifetime, we will file a joint tax return together," Sabia said. But with the Defense of Marriage Act, her dream seems to be slipping further away, she said.

Dixon and Sabia want to adopt a child when they are financially ready, even though they know that in the U.S. two people of the same sex cannot adopt a child. And, because they are also an interracial couple, they may never get the opportunity, they said.

"A heterosexual couple can have a baby by accident," Sabia said. "We have to earn the right to have a child."

Sabia and Dixon are like any other ordinary couple, gay or straight. They live together and have to deal with the same things that everyone else deals with, Sabia said.

"We talk about money, our joint checking account - everything that everyone else with that kind of intimacy talks about," she said.

Both women realize that not everyone accepts the lifestyle they live.

"If anything, I just want people to know that we're not quite as freakish as they thought we are," Dixon said. "Inside, we're just as normal as they are. The only thing different is who we love."

Sabia agreed with Dixon and posed the question that has so many people in disagreement. "How we love each other is no different. Why does who we love become the issue?"

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