By M. Stephanie Murray
Arizona Daily Wildcat
October 16, 1997

E-zines offer obnoxious humor

Courtesy of www.tweak.com Arizona Daily Wildcat

Online magazines, or e-zines, are odd ducks. Since the major news hunters-and-gatherers (CNN, MSNBC and just about every newspaper in the world) take care of the important, factual stuff, the zines are left to deal with the marginalia, the stuff on the sidelines.

Or, as is the case with The Onion (www.theonion.com), the stuff that isn't true but would make for great stories.

Like some Bizarro-world edition of USA Today, The Onion offers snappy headlines, nifty "infographics" and person-on-the-street commentary, along with attractive head shots of these members of the public. Only, it's all made up and will probably offend those who stumble unwittingly upon the site.

For example, the topic of the Oct. 15 edition "What do you think?" section is the Promise Keepers' Washington, D.C., rally. Those quoted include "Chris Foote, Realtor" who says "I was at the rally, and when I realized all the sins I had committed, I began to pray and weep hysterically. Then I accused Goody Brewster and Tituba the slave girl of witchcraft and began to whirl around uncontrollably and stab random people."

Most of what The Onion is about can be summed up in their headlines. "Taco Bell Launches New 'Morning After' Burrito," "Heroic PETA Commandos Kill 49, Save Rabbit" and "It's Not A Crack House, It's A Crack Home" are some of the titillating stories collected in the news archives.

Call it a witty, scathing parody of the pointless issues that obsess the American public. Call it the product of a bunch of liberal-arts degree-holders with too much time on their hands. Whatever. I call it good, obnoxious fun. Read it. It's funnier first-hand.

The other side of zines focuses on the individual. Since most are run by one or two people with a handful of contributors, zines wind up with a very particular perspective. But when the perspective is interesting and amusing, that can work.

Tweak (www.tweak.com) works. The most recent edition offers a nightmarish account of visiting EuroDisney and a gonzo report on trying out for "College Jeopardy!" Titled "Fear and Loathing in the Form of a Question," this story is by a man who acknowledges that his college time has mostly been spent "taking bong hits and trying to suck bean dip through a swizzle stick."

"Exon" is a section filled with "smut and filth ... found on the Net," much like that derided by the titular Senator Exon.

"First Person" is just that, introduced by a quote from Merrit Malloy: "Don't ever tell a story like it wasn't about you." One of the stranger contributors to this section is Floppy, who appears to be a stuffed rabbit. Floppy's travels in Russia and Las Vegas are chronicled in pictures and Floppy's own narrative.

Tweak's mission statement says, "We want those who are on it to realize that the Web can be so much more than a digital brochure rack." There's more to the Web than making money and being well-informed. Have some fun, why don't ya'?