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Lute, give me the ball!

Dear Coach Olson,

I realize with the unexpected departures of Ruben Douglas, Luke Recker and Robertas Javtokas along with the injury to Richard Jefferson, your team is in need of a player or two who possess the skills to drive your players to greater heights.

What your team needs now is someone like myself, a baller straight from the Midwest, the basketball hotbed of Richland, Mich.

I am the Jesus Shuttlesworth of Richland. "He Got Game," that's me, and you know all about that movie, Coach O, because you were in it.

Don't laugh, I would be a McKale favorite and I could lead your team to the next level. I am talking about a national championship here, baby.

Though I am a little undersized at 5' 8" to play the three, I have the determination and guts to battle with the big boys.

Plus, Luke Walton is better suited coming off the bench, but he will not be replacing me because with my skills, you will never want me to take a breather.

The big boys of the Pac-10 would fear this chiseled 155-pound frame.

I have been running, too. My 40 time from the couch to the refrigerator and back is 5.3. I am Allen Iverson in a pair of sandals.

Mark Madsen, the Collins twins, Dan Gadzuric - they don't stand a chance when I take my 15-inch vertical to the hardwood. I am a skywalker, I play my game above the rim.

What you need to understand here, Coach O, is that I am a diamond in the rough, a PTPer, an All-American who has been hiding from the national spotlight.

I once scored four points in a JV high school game, and most impressively, I did it in only two minutes of play. The fact that my team was winning by 30 with two minutes left is of no importance.

I have improved, though, from my high schools days, and after four years here at UA, I am ready to dominate.

Eddie House may be able to score 61 points in a Pac-10 game, but can he hit the fade away three in my driveway without landing in the pricker bushes? I don't think so.

Coach, I am a bomber, just give me the rock and watch the scoreboard light up. The three-point line is like a free throw to me - it's NBN, nothing but nylon.

In fact, I find the college three-point line embarrassing. Shaq could shoot 40 percent from there, it's barely more than a free throw.

I have the grades, too. Well, on second thought, I might not be an Academic All-American but I will stay eligible and your study tables will probably even improve my grades.

Understand though, I am a highly sought after athlete and have been getting calls from Duke, Michigan State and Cincinnati. Even Bobby Knight called, but I told him to go to hell, he has an attitude problem.

But I want to play for you Coach. I am a Wildcat and would be the perfect addition to your team. Plus, I would look good in all that Nike gear.

Another extra is that I will not bolt early for the NBA, my parents would kill me if I didn't graduate.

So think it over Coach Olson, it should be an easy decision. You can reach me day or night at 621-7581 or e-mail me, I will be expecting to hear from you soon.

Still draining from way downtown,

Chris Martin