By Arek Sarkissian II
attendant at Maui Beach Tanning
Arizona Daily Wildcat
Thursday April 10, 2003
Tanning attendant recommends tanning beds over natural sun for nude tanning
WILDCAT: So what's your biggest seller?
BRUCE: Um, probably designer skin.
WILDCAT: Hmm, why is that?
BRUCE: It's ·
WILDCAT: Because I'd buy some just for the name! Like designer skin, use this and you'll look like a Versace, come on!
BRUCE: Uh, no. It's just cool; it's kind of cheap.
WILDCAT: What does it do?
BRUCE: It helps you tan. It's a tanner.
WILDCAT: Well do you ever see anyone come in here with sunscreen?
BRUCE: Yeah, a lot of people use sunscreen for their face.
WILDCAT: I can just see it, some guy's all screaming, "I need the number four please!"
WILDCAT: You see? It's all about the Coppertone! Well, do you ever have to turn people away, like they're just way too dark? Like some opposite of Michael Jackson comes in and you're all, "No, just go, go away."
BRUCE: I don't think we've ever turned anyone away from being too dark.
WILDCAT: What about when your skin starts getting all wrinkly, like I've got this big wrinkle spot on my chest. You'd still let them come in?
BRUCE: Um, no. Well, obviously if you tan for your entire life, you're like, going to have some skin disease or something.
WILDCAT PHOTOGRAPHER: Like cancer?
WILDCAT: Well what we were talking about on the way over here was why would you want to go tanning when we have sun for like 300 days each year?
BRUCE: Because the biggest thing is you could kind of, um ·
WILDCAT PHOTOGRAPHER: Tan naked?
BRUCE: Yeah you could.
WILDCAT: Even guys? Great! I won't look like an Oreo anymore!
BRUCE: You can also modify how long you want to go, and outside you can't do that because the rays are different all the time.
WILDCAT: So is it healthier to tan here or outside?
BRUCE: Here, because you can see how long you're going to go.
WILDCAT: Plus, if you're tanning naked, you never know who's looking.
BRUCE: Yeah, you don't want your neighbors peeking in.