By
Ty Young
Arizona Daily Wildcat
UA senior balances children, work, school
When Misty Dillon graduated high school in 1995, she was touted as a "special senior" - complete with a full-page pullout in the school yearbook including a photo spread and a biography of her time at Buena High School in Sierra Vista.
She did not gain notoriety just because of her 3.98 grade point average, nor because of the numerous clubs and advance placement classes that she had participated in during high school.
Dillon was a "special senior" because she did all this while raising twin sons Jaden and Kalen for the final year of high school.
Five years later, Dillon, a psychology senior, is nearing the end of her university career. Despite carrying a 4.0 GPA and memberships to an honorary and academic fraternities, she has encountered a very traumatic and difficult life at the University of Arizona.
While she certainly is a non-traditional student, Dillon said she hardly feels like the "special senior" from years past.
"It's definitely not the same," she said. "It's like a dream to me, to just be at school all day and hang out there and nothing else. I have never been able to feel like the average college student who is just going to school and their whole life is just the campus life."
Dillon, who married prior to her senior year in high school, has never taken a break from her studies. After graduating from high school, she enrolled at Cochise College in Sierra Vista due to the financial burdens that accompanied her children. After five semesters at the junior college, she and her now ex-husband moved to Tucson, where she enrolled at the UA.
While this step would prove to be a test of her endurance and desire, it was her love and loyalty to her children that guided her down a path that most UA students will never know.
Broken promises, misleading advice
The support and help she received in high school was certainly not mirrored in her college experience, Dillon said. Misleading advice from school officials and academic advisors have pushed her expected graduation date from December 2000 to August 2001, at the earliest.
Dillon blames miscommunication between the administration and herself for the problems, as well as the fact that the UA does not provide services for students in her situation.
After filing for a divorce in March, Dillon found herself in an unenviable situation - a full-time student, working full time while raising two children. Dillon said she was misled by academic advisers, administrators and financial aid advisers all the while dealing with the hardships of divorce.
All this led to her decision to leave school last semester to focus on her children while attempting to gain footing on a perilous uphill battle towards graduation.
"The worst thing about it is that I feel that I am fighting to get my degree," she said. "It's all these barriers and obstacles - it's just frustrating because it seems that they (UA officials) are supposed to be there to help me."
No child care, no help
In addition to the advising problems that Dillon said she faced, her family needs were also adding to her difficulty. Because the UA had no child-care facilities nor child-care programs aside from student subsidies, Dillon was forced to care for Kalen and Jaden, who are now in first grade, by herself during difficult divorce proceedings.
"That was the main reason for me getting out of the semester, because all of the horrible things that were going on with (the divorce)," she said. "That, and lack of child care. I had no one to help me with my children all of a sudden. I had no help and support, I had no family here, and nobody at the school was giving me any options as to what I could do in a situation like that."
Dillon, who works full-time as an contract administrative assistant at Raytheon, said the UA needs some type of child care program to help other students like herself.
"I don't understand why (university officials) couldn't create a child-care facility or some kind of program," she said. "Day-cares are very expensive and it wouldn't surprise me if they did get a day-care center, it would be just as expensive as everything else. I would hope that eventually they would work it out that there could be child care of some sort."
A child-care facility would alleviate the stress that student parents face on a daily basis, Dillon said. She added that some potential students do not have a chance because child care is so expensive.
"Teenage moms have it so hard," she said. "There are some girls out there who are doing it totally on their own, they want to go to school but they also have to work to pay for child care."
Besides the lack of a child-care program, Dillon said there are other obstacles involving class schedules that continue add to her frustration.
"I have to get my degree," she said. " The U of A does not cater to evening and weekend classes as well as other places do. It is virtually impossible to get classes that I need at the times that I need them.
"Nobody will even look at me without my degree. It is so frustrating because I am so close to getting my degree. And just the fact that I lost that semester, put me back. Plus I can't go to school full time anymore.
"A perfect example is in one of the classes that I am taking, there are all these little seminars and little meetings that offered for extra credit or for this and that," Dillon added. "They are all offered at times that I have to be at work. How is that going to help me?"
College life for a single mother
For Dillon, responsibilities extend much further than the boundaries of classrooms, homework, and basic study hours.
"Either the night before, or that morning, besides making sure I am ready for school or work, I would have to make sure that they were ready," she said. "That means I have to get their clothes ready, their snacks ready that they would need, any lunch money, all their homework put together."
Basic school preparation includes her own studies, as well as those of her children. Because Jaden and Kalen are the most important priority in her life, Dillon said she must keep to a well-defined yet ever-changing schedule.
"It's a lot of work because I have to make sure that me and them are ready and we are all out the door in time for them to get to school," she said. "I have to drop them off real quick and then I have to get to work. Then, I have to leave work on time so I can get to school. Then I get home from work late at night. I have to work it out so that I can't have school when I have no one to watch the boys."
Because she is involved in extracurricular activities such as the psychology honorary fraternity Psi Chi and the academic fraternity Gamma Beta Phi, she often brings her children along with her.
"If I wasn't able to take them than I wouldn't be able to do it," said Dillon, who also volunteers at the UA? Tucson? Women's Commission and is part of the National Organization for Women
Dillon added that through her experience at the UA, she has learned to appreciate the lives of other students - and the advantages that they possess.
"They don't even realize how good they have it - especially those who are there on their parent's money. They have no clue how good they have it, it's just awesome."
Despite her unique college experience, Dillon said she will never look down upon her experiences as student mother. In fact, she said it has helped her grow as a person and helped her realize her priorities.
"Having your kids is no excuse not to go to school," she said. "It is hard and it is not the same experience, but I just think it is really important. Now that I am in my 20s and my kids are a little older and I have a house, all I have to do now is work on myself."
Dillon hopes to graduate this summer, but now has another difficult task ahead of her. In her quest for her college degree, she is now searching for a new job.
"I love going to U of A though," she said. "Ever since I began going to the U of A I have absolutely loved it."
