Sabrina Noble Creative writing junior

Resident assistant talks about evicting students and justifications for illicit alcohol

WILDCAT: So, what's it like being an RA?

NOBLE: It gets pretty crazy.

WILDCAT: You have to knock people around, keep them in line?

NOBLE: Oh yeah.

WILDCAT: Yeah, you look so brutal.

NOBLE: Oh, you'd be surprised. The other day we made T-shirts and mine said ÎI'm authorized to do terrible things, have a great day.'

WILDCAT: That's hilarious.

NOBLE: I wore it around on rounds.

WILDCAT: So, what's the worst thing you've had to do to punish someone?

NOBLE: Some people have been kicked out of the building.

WILDCAT: Really? That's nice that some people are homeless because of you. Poor little freshmen.

NOBLE: Yeah. We've had to call the police a couple of times. The coolest thing I ever saw was some residents built a skateboarding ramp in one of the hallways. I walked in and just laughed. Oh, you crazy kids.

WILDCAT: So, I'm sure you've had people with alcohol in the room. What's the craziest excuse you've gotten for it being there?

NOBLE: "I don't know what this is doing here. Where did this come from?" I'm like, "I'm sure it just materialized in your room."

NOBLE: Weird. It was the beer fairy. A big drunk man in a tutu who was just like, "There you go!" So, who would win in a street fight, Popeye or Mighty Mouse?

NOBLE: Mighty Mouse, definitely.

WILDCAT: Why?

NOBLE: Mighty Mouse would have to be clever, he is, naturally, a mouse.

WILDCAT: What would Mighty Mouse have to do to win your love? You know, to make little Mighty Mice babies?

NOBLE: He would have to take me on a vacation around the world.

WILDCAT: And of course, he could fly you around the world because he is a mouse that is mighty.