Patrick McDebitt campus visitor

Phoenician new in town, has a pierced tongue, gets lost on campus after donating plasma

WILDCAT: So what are you doing wandering around campus so late at night?

MCDEBITT: Well I just got back from donating plasma and now I'm trying to get back home but I'm lost.

WILDCAT: You're lost? Have you not been to your home often?

MCDEBITT: I just moved out here like a week and a half ago so I don't know where anything is.

WILDCAT: From where?

MCDEBITT: Phoenix.

WILDCAT: Were you able to find your way home there?

MCDEBITT: Yes, most of the time.

WILDCAT: So, have you been walking around a lot?

MCDEBITT: Yeah, I was supposed to meet my friend at the Greyhound Station, but I can't find where it is.

WILDCAT: You are totally going the wrong way.

MCDEBITT: That's what I thought, but I started going this way and then I turned around and I got all confused.

WILDCAT PHOTOGRAPHER: (Starts giving him directions).

WILDCAT: Okay boys, back to me. So, did you eat cookies at the plasma place? You're looking at me funny ... do they even serve cookies there? No, not so much, okay, I'm not too smart. Wait, you have a tongue ring, how long have you had that?

MCDEBITT: I've had it for a while, so it doesn't even hurt anymore.

WILDCAT: Ahhh ... stop pulling on it!

MCDEBITT: Here, watch me take it out.

WILDCAT: That is so gross. Don't do that. Okay you're doing it anyway. Yeah, I'm grossed out. Dude, you have a weird shaped tongue.

MCDEBITT: I know, it's cool.

WILDCAT: Have you ever considered sticking a golf tee in your tongue hole?

MCDEBBIT: No.

WILDCAT: You should. That would be dang funny.

MCDEBITT: I don't think so. I had a big fat one in here once though.

WILDCAT: So, you won't put a plastic tee in there, but you'll jam a metal stake through your tongue. That makes sense. I think you lost too much plasma.