Joseph Mendelis undeclared freshman

Freshman has phobia of foam, trained by sisters to never tell a girl she's Îfat'

Wildcat: Excuse me, do you have a couple of minutes?

Mendelis: That depends, what is this for?

Wildcat: I'm Claire from the Daily Wildcat and you're on the spot. Is that good enough for you?

Mendelis: Sure, I guess.

Wildcat: What's your favorite red thing?

Mendelis: Andrew's shirt · because it's on Andrew and he's a good guy.

Wildcat: So it's not because the shirt's from Se–or Frog's?

Mendelis: Yes, that's definitely the reason.

Wildcat: I was just there in Puerto Vallarta over spring break. My friends and I rocked the foam party. It was good times.

Mendelis: I heard about that. I'm a little afraid of foam parties.

Wildcat: I'm not exactly sure what I did. · I remember the foam. · I remember the tequila · and then: blur.

Mendelis: Yeah, I'm not so sure about foam parties. I have a fear of drowning in them.

Wildcat: Well, the only advice I can give you would be to avoid wearing too short of a skirt. Hands will wander, if you know what I mean.

Mendelis: I don't think that's a problem for me though. I don't usually wear the skirts now.

Wildcat: Are you into the longer spring dresses now?

Mendelis: No, no · I'm pretty into jeans, actually.

Wildcat: Do you think these pants make me look fat?

Mendelis: No, not at all. I don't think you're fat. You're quite thin, actually.

Wildcat: Has your girlfriend rehearsed you on that?

Mendelis: No, my sisters. You're not allowed to tell people they're fat.

Wildcat: Oh, I see. So you're saying I'm fat now.

Mendelis: Yes, you're fat. You're terribly obese. Man, this is going to backfire on me and make me look like a schmuck in the newspaper.

Wildcat: Yeah, that's usually what I go for.

Mendelis: Grrrrrrrrreat. This is Andrew and Erin by the way, if you care.

Wildcat: No, not really.

Mendelis: Is this going to make it in the paper?

Wildcat: Well, tell me why your "On the Spot" should make it.

Mendelis: I don't think it should. Because I'm uninteresting.