This year's spring Club Crawl might feel cozy, with zero bars on North Fourth Avenue participating in the event, leaving East Congress Street to handle all the rocking itself.

"Basically, the (Fourth Avenue) bars backed out," said Jeb Schoonover, event coordinator and Rialto Theatre owner.

Despite playing the Grinch role, Fourth Avenue bars will still be accepting drink orders.

"I think there was the attitude amongst them, that they could benefit from the event and not be part of it. Personally I think it's a bad attitude to take," Schoonover said.

You may be thinking, "But why should I, of legal drinking age, pay $7 to hear countless local bands rock just about every venue in the downtown area, when I can get wasted at home on whip-its and pump my new William Hung CD?"

My friend, you are pathetic.

The good part is you don't have to be.

Turn that Usher t-shirt inside out, slide into any Zia Records location in advance for the wristband (because if your sorry ass waits, it'll cost you $10 at the door), and get your Mick Jagger-swagger on Saturday night.

As a service, Go Wild will even include the complete schedule (subject to changes), so your stoned, drunk ass can needle in and out of the Congress clubs and stages at will.

Enjoy.

Like Vegas, Except With Music, The Outside Stages On East Congress Street:

Zia Mainstage

12 a.m. Sunday Afternoon

11 p.m. Camp Courageous

10 p.m. Chango Malo

9 p.m. The Jons

8 p.m. Gorilla Behind Bars

AVA Stage

12 a.m. The Zsa Zsas

11 p.m. Bad News Blues

10 p.m. Hipster Daddy-0

9 p.m. Dutsi Spoon

8 p.m. Dolemite Jones

KLPX Stage

12 a.m. Innisfail

11 p.m. 7 Days of May

10 p.m. Scratching The Surface

9 p.m. Whiskey Bitch

8 p.m. Your Own Invention

Americana Stage

12 a.m. Al Perry

11 p.m. Dave Insley

10 p.m. Tallboy

9 p.m. Kevin Pakulis

8 p.m. Last Call Girls

Rhythm Stage

11:40 p.m. Spirit Familia

10:40 p.m. Spirit Familia

9:40 p.m. KBZM

8:40 p.m. KBZM

Blues Stage

11:40 p.m. Tom Walbank

10:40 p.m. Tom Walbank

9:40 p.m. Ken Tucker

8:40 p.m. Ken Tucker

My Liver Barhopped East Congress Street And All I Got Was This Stupid Cirrhosis:

The Rialto
(318 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. PH8

11 p.m. Is To Feel

10 p.m. Gat-rot

9 p.m. Blynd

8 p.m. Derived

Hotel Congress (outside)
(311 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. Mariachi Luz De Luna

11 p.m. Sub Rosa

10 p.m. Great American Tragedy

9 p.m. Nowhere Man

8 p.m. Musica Obscura

Club Congress (inside)
(311 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. Manifold

11 p.m. The Therapists

10 p.m. Deludes

9 p.m. Bombs for the Bored

8 p.m. Music Video

Sharks
(256 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. Chuck Stanton

11 p.m. Funky Bonz

10 p.m. Electric Buffalo

9 p.m. 115 Down

8 p.m. Jane Crowe

7 p.m. Los Nawty Dogs

Wilde Playhouse
(135 E. Congress St.)

11:30 p.m. Orion

10 p.m. Round The House

9:30 p.m. Donnegal Heather

7-Black Cats
(121 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. Mankind

11 p.m. Troy's Bucket

10 p.m. Last Call Brawlers

9 p.m. Sonars

8 p.m. Kristen

Vaudeville
(110 E. Congress)

12 a.m. Jesse From Truck

11:30 p.m. Cathy Rivers

11 p.m. Mark Insley

10:30 Annie Hawkins

10 p.m. Emily Long

9:30 p.m. Matt Mitchell

9 p.m. Dave Gleason

8:30 p.m. Ozlo

Heart Five

(61 E. Congress St.)

10:30 p.m. Fashion Show

Where To Eat And Not Miss A Beat:

Red Room at the Grill
(100 E. Congress St.)

12 a.m. The Fashonistas

11 p.m. Rosano Brother's Virtual Quartet

10 p.m. Leila Lopez

Enoteca Pizzeria Wine Bar
(58 W. Congress St.)

12 a.m. Empty Box

11 p.m. Nevershine

10 p.m. Red Vinyl 45

8 p.m. Stop Tyler

Irene's
(254 E. Congress. St.)

9 p.m.- 1 a.m. Salsa lessons & dancing

Where To Bring Your Underage Girlfriend:

Club La Nuit (All age venue)
(310 East Congress St.)

7 p.m.- 1 a.m. Sugarbush, Galactic Federation of Love plus more

Biblio Bookstore (All age venue)
(222 E. Congress St.)

7-10 p.m. Acoustic Music with Andrew Bode-Lang, Tony Mancus, & Mike Sadler

Just Off Congress:

Samiengo Place
(222 South Church Ave.)

7:30 p.m. Cantrell & Mitzi

9 p.m. Tommy Tucker