Illustration by Holly Randall

Exploring the female orgasm: coming to the point

Her body curls and clenches with tingles of pleasure, a feeling some UA women have yet to understand or experience.

Regardless, if a woman is exploring with the different types of orgasms, masturbating, or learning how to get off without faking it, experts agree being comfortable is essential for achieving an orgasm.

Though some women may feel like a victim of orgasmic dysfunction, or the inability to climax during sex, experts said this diagnosis is rare for young women. Instead of needing medical treatment, college-aged women can usually find orgasmic relief from different methods of arousal and self-discovery.

I usually tell men if they want to start being intimate, take out the trash.– Lee Ann Hamilton Campus Health Service health educator

For this reason, the unpredictability of achieving the ever-elusive female orgasm is evidence that, although two people are involved in the same activity, they do not necessarily share the same experience. Several health professionals and students have some good ideas about why.

"Guys have physical stimulation down to a science. They're able to cum without an emotional connection," said Rose Anderson, a junior majoring in English. "Whereas a girl, it is more emotional because she has to be stimulated in a specific way that turns her on, whether it's talking, emotions or foreplay."

The female orgasm, which is the sexual peak of intercourse, is a series of quick muscular contractions causing an overwhelming sensation of pleasure because of increased blood flow to the clitoris and vagina, said Dr. Ilana Addis, an assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology.

For some women, Addis said achieving an orgasm is not as simple as it is for men because many women are aroused from the emotional aspect of sex.

"I usually tell men if they want to start being intimate, take out the trash," said Lee Ann Hamilton, a health educator at Campus Health Service and co-author of the UA SexTalk newsletter.

Unlike men, women are not as easily aroused by visual and physical stimuli, Hamilton said. For women, seeing someone naked or being touched in a sensitive area doesn't quite do the trick. Instead, communication and intimacy have a big impact on how aroused the woman gets.

Illustration by Holly Randall

Hilary Rees, a pre-nursing sophomore, said although she is not in a relationship, she likes when a man is romantic before and during sex.

"I also love touching before sex, not necessarily cuddling, but feeling each other's bodies and getting a sense of who we are with our hands," Rees said.

No two vaginas are exactly the same

What feels pleasurable for some women will not feel good for others. The only way to find out what works is with practice and communication.

Taking a hands-on approach can be helpful. Try showing your partner where and how to move his or her hands, fingers, penis or sex toy, as well as how fast or slow to move and for how long, Hamilton said.

Granted, emotions have a big influence on how pleasurable sex is for many women, but Anderson said emotions aren't an issue for her when having an orgasm.

"Personally for me, it's about rough sex, lots of thrusting," said Anderson, who is dating exclusively. "I also like talking dirty, being submissive is very hot."

But hard and fast is not always the consensus.

"I have more of an orgasm from slower sex because of everything that's involved," said Jessica Barmash, a family studies and human development sophomore. "It has to do with emotions and physical contact, and combining the two is intense. It's kind of hot."

G-Wiz

The notorious G-spot is highly praised, but can be hard to find.

Labeled the Gräfenberg spot, after Dr. Ernest Gräfenberg published an article in the 1950s about vaginal erotic sensitivity, the G-spot is a urethral sponge located on the anterior wall of the vagina about one-third to three-quarters of a finger deep, according to the National Women's Health Network's packet The Female Orgasm.

When touched, the G-spot is believed to cause series of intense vaginal orgasms deeper than typical clitoral orgasms, but results are not identical for all women.

There's a big difference between G-spot sensations and the more "fluttery" feelings from clitoral orgasms, said Ana Muñiz, a women's studies and sociology sophomore.

"Vaginal orgasms are really intense and more emotional," said Muñiz, who is in a five-year relationship. "It's hard to put into words, but when you have one, you know."

Women looking for their G-spot can explore with or without a partner.

When having sex, the packet suggests the woman kneel on the floor next to a bed and lean forward with her elbows on the mattress. As the partner enters from behind, the couple should experiment with different thrusting methods, whether shallow or deep. This position may also be effective when the woman is standing.

When exploring on by themselves, females are recommended to squat and insert one or two fingers while making a "come here" motion. This is supposed to "awaken" the vagina to stimulation and also help the woman find where her G-spot is, according to the packet.

The clitoris climax

Differing from the G-spot, the clitoris is a ball of nerve endings above the urethral opening, Addis said. When stimulated, it is often the easiest way for women to achieve orgasm.

Like vaginas, all clitorises are different, ranging from 2 to 20 millimeters in diameter. Although some are more obvious to see than others, the clitoris is one of the most sensitive areas of the vagina.

Because the clitoris is especially sensitive, it can be painful for a penis to directly hit it when trying to have sex, Addis said. But many women find manual stimulation of the clitoris during sex pleasurable.

Jennifer Cook, a pre-health education junior, said the most common way for her to orgasm is when her partner rubs and touches her clitoris while having sex.

Cook, who is not in a relationship, said multiple-stimulation orgasms feel like an "internal rush," which is not only pleasurable but also stress relieving.

"It feels like the blood is rushing throughout your body, and you have some sort of release or letting go," Cook said. "Once it's over, you're almost high."

Faking it down to an art

Although men may think they can tell when their partner orgasms, some women fake it more times than not and for multiple reasons.

"It's very common," Hamilton said. "(Women) fake an orgasm to make their partner feel good, to keep the relationship OK, or because it's taking too long and they know it's not going to happen."

About 61 percent of college women said they have faked an orgasm, compared to 18 percent of college men, according to a 1996 Details magazine nationwide campus sex survey.

"There's a certain point in sex when you know you're either going to get off or you're not," Rees said. "For me, I feel like (faking it) is best for a guy's ego. It's an issue I don't want to deal with, having a guy be upset because he couldn't pleasure me like I could pleasure him."

Although faking it may seem like a little white lie, it could be a sign of underlying problems or sexual dysfunction, Hamilton said.

Vagina Junction - what's your dysfunction?

Sexual dysfunction can include not achieving an orgasm, desire and arousal disorders and experiencing consistent pain during sex.

Health problems, such as diabetes, depression and high blood pressure can also attribute to sexual dysfunction. Addis said women who have been sexually abused or assaulted usually also have problems becoming aroused or climaxing.

But when a woman fakes an orgasm, she could be contributing to a potential orgasmic dysfunction because lying blocks effective communication and hinders progressing an honest relationship, Hamilton said.

Amy Cegielski, a marketing and business management senior, said she has never had an orgasm, even when she was in a two-year relationship.

"It definitely wasn't a lack of trying, I think we probably tried everything," Cegielski said.

Despite failed attempts, Cegielski said she has never faked an orgasm.

"It never crossed my mind (to fake it)," Cegielski said. "I never felt like it was something I should do."

Instead of faking an orgasm, women can turn to other methods to better their sexual experience.

Practicing pelvic floor exercises on a daily basis betters a woman's sexual response, Addis said, because it keeps the pelvic floor toned and healthy. She recommends women exercise their pelvic muscles 10 times, three times a day.

"Contract for 10 seconds, then relax for 10 seconds, " Addis said. "You can do it almost anywhere, like at your desk or waiting at a stoplight."

'I touch myself'

Often a good discovery for women who have never experienced orgasm, masturbating can be a handy alternative.

"Sometimes the only way to find out (what feels good) is with trial and error on your own," Addis said.

Alisha Gibson, a women's studies and history sophomore, said she began masturbating a while ago, but was unable to make herself orgasm until last year.

"I was so excited," said Gibson, a member of the Feminist Student Activists. "I bought a vibrator last summer and it's awesome. I highly recommend it."

Though not all women are open to masturbation, Gibson, who is in a three-year relationship, said she thinks society labels the practice as "dirty" or "taboo" when it comes to females but not necessarily for males.

"But it's not dirty. It's only dirty because society makes it dirty," Gibson said. "It's comforting to know other women are also doing it. It's nothing to be afraid or ashamed of."

But many women don't feel comfortable masturbating, said Melissa McGee, a health service coordinator at Campus Health and co-author of the UA Sex Talk newsletter.

Forty percent of college women have never masturbated compared to 12 percent of college men, according to the 1996 survey.

"It never really occurred to me to do it myself," said Emily Hattrup. "It's not that I look down on other people who do it, but I just don't feel comfortable doing it."

Hattrup, a chemistry senior, said her boyfriend of three years once mentioned the idea of trying to masturbate, but she was slightly offended.

"The point of being sexual is to have a partner, to have it be an expression of how you feel about it each other," she said. "I guess to me, doing it yourself misses the point."

Muñiz, a member of the Feminist Student Activists, said she doesn't orgasm from masturbation. Though she said she has not experimented with a vibrator, masturbating manually can be a big effort, especially when she's tired.

"For some reason I just can't cum from masturbating, but I'm jealous of those who can," she joked.