It seems like Washington athletic director Barbara Hedges is having a hell of a time finding a men's basketball coach.

Her first choice to replace Bob Bender, whom she asked to resign last month after his Huskies finished eighth in the Pacific 10 Conference - posting their third consecutive losing season in the process - was Quin Snyder.

But the Missouri coach said Sunday he would stay with the Tigers because of the team's current players.

"We have some very special players on our team, and we have made a tremendous investment in each other over the last few years," Snyder stated in a press release.

Then UW's second choice, Gonzaga's Mark Few, announced Monday that he was withdrawing his name from consideration for the job. Curiously, he also cited loyalty to his players.

"We have built something very special and unique at Gonzaga University," Few said. "I love my players, past and present, and appreciate their support during this process. I look forward to our future together."

Yesterday, Minnesota head coach and UW coaching candidate Dan Monson followed Few and Snyder with the third withdrawal from consideration in as many days. His reason, as told to ESPN, was loyalty to his players, especially freshman Rick Rickert, whom he convinced to forsake Arizona after Rickert initially stated his desire to attend UA.

Apparently, there's an epidemic of "player loyalty" among college coaches in the Northwest.

But I'm here to help. Before the Huskies deign to hire a guy who can't even abbreviate properly - Saint Louis head coach Lorenzo Romar, next on Hedges' wish list - they should look down here in Arizona, where there's a prime candidate they're overlooking: me.

That's right, I am officially announcing my candidacy for the Washington men's basketball head coaching job.

So I'm only 20, have no head coaching experience in any sport at any level and don't own a decent tie or a clipboard. Big deal.

I'm definitely as qualified as the Southwestern Washington Technical School assistant coach they're going to wind up with otherwise.

Let's take a look at my resumŽ:

Experience: Four years of varsity experience in high school (Tombstone High School), including two-time All-American honors. (I wasn't even all-conference, but it's not like I'm applying for the head football gig at Notre Dame - Hedges isn't going to check.)

Schooling: Currently attending the University of Arizona, where I frequently attend (watch on TV) men's basketball games and observe the coaching philosophy of Lute Olson, who has lost to the Huskies a grand total of six times in the last 16 years.

Extracurricular activities: Covered the men's basketball (club sports) beat for two consecutive years (one semester) for the Arizona Daily Wildcat.

Coaching philosophy: Who needs a coaching philosophy? Has anybody over there in the athletics department looked at UW's roster lately? The Huskies lose the only player to start every game last season and the man who brought a whole new meaning to the word "husky," 270-pound center David Dixon. My coaching philosophy's easy: Give the ball to Doug Wrenn.

Recruiting skills: Wait, UW recruits? Oh, that's right, they had Dan Dickau on the bench for a while until he transferred to Gonzaga and built up all that "player loyalty" with Few. The team's best player - Wrenn - is a transfer. I doubt I could do much worse than Bender.

Miscellaneous: The most important qualification I have is one that's often overlooked in coaching hires: media savvy. I'd tell it like it is. If some ambitious college reporter asked me how I thought UW was going to do against Arizona, I'd say, "Well, I think we're going to get our asses shellacked." If Lute Olson threw my reporters quotes like that, we might like him as much as that one columnist over at the Arizona Daily Star does.

So there you go, Ms. Hedges. You can now consider me an official candidate for the job. My e-mail address is below this column, and my office phone number is at the top of the sports section. I'll be awaiting your call.